LAST NIGHT I WENT TO BED WITH MARK BECAUSE HE WAS TIRED. I WASN'T. I LAID THERE FOR AWHILE AND CONSIDERED GETTING UP AND SLEEPING ON THE SOFA.
WHICH REMINDED ME OF THE YEARS,YEARS I COULD NOT SLEEP IN THE BED. NOW IT HAS TO BE SOMETHING SERIOUS TO TAKE ME OUT OF OUR BED.
IT GOT ME THINKING ABOUT HIM . IT IS NOT THAT I NEVER DID THINK ABOUT WHAT HE WENT THROUGH. I JUST SEE MORE OF THE BEFORE AND AFTER AND I FEEL FOR HIM. HOW MUST HE HAVE FELT. HE WAS THERE EVERY NIGHT WITHOUT ME. HE HEARD ME SICK EVERY NIGHT. HE COULD DO NOTHING. HE HAD TO LAY THERE AND WONDER IF HE WAS GOING TO LOSE ME. EVEN NOW WHEN I STRUGGLE HE WORRIES. HE SPENT NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AFTER NIGHT WITHOUT ME NEXT TO HIM AND ALONE.
IT GOT ME THINKING ABOUT HIM . IT IS NOT THAT I NEVER DID THINK ABOUT WHAT HE WENT THROUGH. I JUST SEE MORE OF THE BEFORE AND AFTER AND I FEEL FOR HIM. HOW MUST HE HAVE FELT. HE WAS THERE EVERY NIGHT WITHOUT ME. HE HEARD ME SICK EVERY NIGHT. HE COULD DO NOTHING. HE HAD TO LAY THERE AND WONDER IF HE WAS GOING TO LOSE ME. EVEN NOW WHEN I STRUGGLE HE WORRIES. HE SPENT NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AFTER NIGHT WITHOUT ME NEXT TO HIM AND ALONE.
SOME OF OUR BEST TIMES ARE AT NIGHT. LOTS OF TIMES WE SHOULD BE SLEEPING BUT WE ARE LAUGHING AND JOKING. IT IS SOMETHING I REALLY CHERISH. OUR MR AND MRS FUN.
WE DID NOT HAVE THAT. HE DIDN'T HAVE HIS WIFE EITHER.
I WAS BARELY FUNCTIONING FOR YEARS. I TRIED TO NOT THINK OF IT. I WAS SO SICK I WAS JUST ON AUTO PILOT.
THAT WAS HARD ON US BOTH. WHEN THE WORST WAS OVER I WILL ADMIT I HAD A HARD TIME BEING HIS WIFE AGAIN. I DIDN'T KNOW WHO I WAS. HE ALMOST LOST ME THEN TOO. I NEVER LOST HIM.
HE NEVER THOUGHT IT WAS, NOT IF BUT WHEN, LIKE I DID.
I SURVIVED AND IT IS MOSTLY BEHIND ME. I WILL ALWAYS HAVE MY BRAIN TUMOR AND WILL HAVE TO WATCH IT. IT CAN ALWAYS START GROWING AGAIN. I AM NO LONGER FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE. WE ARE US AGAIN. WE ARE HAPPIER THAN WE HAVE EVEN BEEN. HE HAS HIS WIFE BACK. I HAVE ME BACK. I NO LONGER HAVE ONE FOOT OUT OF THE DOOR. I KNOW I AM TOO HONEST. WE ALL GO THROUGH THINGS. EVERY BAD THING IS SOMETHING TOO LEARN FROM. THE ONLY TRAGEDY ABOUT THE AWFUL THINGS IN LIFE IS IF YOU DON'T LEARN, BUILD, AND USE IT FOR STRENGTH.
I WILL GET TO MY POINT. I WANT EVERYONE TO SEND MARK SOME LOVE. I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE OR IF YOU KNOW HIM OR NOT. TELL HIM GOOD JOB. TELL HIM HE IS WONDERFUL. TELL HIM I APPRECIATE HIM NEVER LEAVING MY SIDE NO MATTER HOW MEAN OR UGLY OR HURTFUL. HE NEVER LEFT.
SO PLEASE PLEASE..GIVE HIM SOME LOVE. HE DESERVES IT. WE ALL DESERVE IT. NONE OF US KNOWS IF WE HAVE THE NEXT MOMENT. SO I WANT TO MAKE ALL OF MY RIGHT NOWS COUNT. SPREAD THE LOVE!
