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 i have no idea when i wrote this..i found it saved but not put out there...so i thought I'd post it.  this isn't me right now though.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I AM DOING HERE TODAY
I LIE

I AM BUSY BUT I STILL FEEL LIKE I AM CHEATING
DOING WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY
BUT I AM NOT BRINGING IN AN INCOME

I AM TRYING TO NOT FORCE THINGS AND LET THINGS PLAY OUT

I AM NOT BEING LAZY
AFTER 4 YEARS OF NO LIFE I HAVE A LOT OF CLUTTER
TO CLEAN OUT

LITERALLY AND NOT

I DIDN'T CHANGE THE COLOR
WHAT-EVER

 g..
HE TAUGHT ME ABOUT FEAR
I GUESS FEAR IS FEAR
BUT WHAT IS ON MY MIND IS PHOBIC KIND OF FEAR
I'VE BEEN OVER PROTECTED KIND OF FEAR
I WON'T LET IT STOP ME BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT GO AWAY

NO ONE HAS ANY IDEA HOW SHELTERED AND OVER PROTECTED I AM

I HAVE THINGS I WANT TO DO LIKE GO TO NYC THAT SCARES ME
IT IS NOT THAT SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN TO ME
IT IS THAT I'LL GET IN A SITUATION..LOST..W/O MONEY
ANYTHING I CAN'T HANDLE OR KNOW HOW TO GET OUT OF

THIS IS WAY TOO GABBY AND ICKY
BARFOLA..LATER..